It’s easy to get married, but staying married requires maintenance. Suppose your car engine starts running rough. Instead of taking it to the repair shop, you ignore the problem. You think, “Well, the car is still running, so I can wait a while before I fix it.” Then your transmission starts acting up, but you don’t fix it. The “check engine” light comes on, but you ignore it.
Later you notice a trail of black smoke following your car, but you don’t fix it. Then you notice that your engine is running hot. By now you realize it’s going to cost a lot of money to repair your vehicle. You say to yourself, “This old clunker has too many problems. I’ll just get rid of it and get a new one.” You think that your problems will be solved by getting another vehicle, never realizing the next car is going to need repairing too.
Maintaining a marriage is like maintaining a car. If we will fix the problems as they arise, it will keep running smoothly and we can enjoy the ride. But if we don’t make the needed repairs we might say, “This marriage has too many problems. I’ll just get rid of my old clunker and get me new one.” God wants us to take our marriages to the Marriage Repair Shop for proper maintenance. A marriage can’t be repaired until we first correct the three causes of marriage breakdowns.
Cause #1: A Selfish Spirit. Selfishness is the source of 99% of marriage conflicts. Adrian Rogers said, “The best marriage in the world is two servants married to each other and the worst marriage in the world is two bosses married to each other. Every marriage requires two funerals and one wedding. The funerals are for the husband and wife to die to their selfishness.”
Cause #2: Unrealistic Expectations. We enter marriage with a picture in our minds of the perfect marriage. But after we get married, we soon discover that we didn’t marry a perfect picture but an imperfect person. After we make this discovery, we will either tear up the picture or we will tear up the person. And that’s why husbands and wives fight—they’re tearing up the person instead of tearing up the picture. The solution is to tear up the picture of a trouble-free marriage and deal with reality.
Cause #3: Different Upbringings. The husband and wife grew up in completely different nests. Each learns to do things differently and each are programmed to do react a certain way. The differences in the way we were raised can become a source of conflict. However, if we will choose the best ideas from both nests and learn from the mistakes that were made, we can build a better nest—and live happily ever after.
READ THIS SERMON—JONAH part 3 “The God of Another Chance” by Kent Crockett
WATCH THIS MUSIC VIDEO—“King of My Heart” by Love & the Outcome
The Sure Cure for Worry is ON SALE for $2.99 at Christian Book Distributors.
Making Life Count Ministries
P.O. Box 680174
Prattville, Alabama 36068-0174
Thank you to all who support this discipleship ministry.
Contributions to Making Life Count Ministries are tax-deductible.